On Christmas Eve, after the dishes had been washed and put away, the presents wrapped, the fire reduced to embers, we slipped out into the night in a cloud of perfume and fancy clothing. Later, as we stood in a darkened sanctuary at midnight, singing carols by candlelight, I remembered just how much I loved this time of year. I stood there in a silent reverie, soaking in the moment, imprinting it on my mind. And when the service ended, I tucked the memory away, to be opened and unfolded in the future like a comforting quilt.





Christmas was wonderful. It was shrouded in a heart-warming cloak of family, friends and food -- lots of it. The day went as quickly as it came, though. I'm always a bit sad when all the weeks of anticipation are suddenly ended in twenty four short hours. But amidst the piles of wrapping strewn about the living room (all those beautifully wrapped packages laying there in a heap! so sad.), the second and third and fourth helpings of food, the kind of laughter that makes your sides ache, memories were made. And in the end, that's all that really matters.




How was your Christmas, lovelies?

Christmas has been my favorite holiday for as long as I can remember. I like the flurry of excitement, the food, the traditions that are wrapped around the season and tied neatly with a bow. But this year...maybe it's because I'm getting older and some of the magic has faded or the fact that time is simply going too quickly, but that little seed of Christmas cheer that's usually planted in the beginning of December just wasn't there this year. Feelings of excitement and joy were replaced with stress and exhaustion -- and the harder I tried to get that cheer, the less I succeeded.
Until I realized something; those things aren't what this time of year is about. It's not about feeling merry and bright -- it's about the quiet anticipation of the birth of our Savior, who humbled himself to be born of a virgin, who died the death of a criminal on a cross. For us. He who is perfectly holy and perfect hung on a cross, for our sins, so that all who believe in him may live in Heaven eternally.

That's what should be on my heart this Christmas, not lamenting the fact that my enthusiasm is missing. And I found, that once I focused on the true meaning, the excitement for December 25th came with it.
Tomorrow is Christmas Eve, which brings the eleven pm candlelight service, my absolute favorite of the year. I am excited to spend a weekend of family and food, excited to relish in festivities, and most of all, excited to celebrate the birth of our Lord.

And because I can't bear to go without my favorite Christmas video ever...


Merry, merry Christmas, friends.

I know this is cliche, but I really love the rain. I like the way it taps out a melody that says listen to me, the way it makes snuggling up with a blanket and a book that much better, the way it makes the room dark in the middle of the afternoon.



The rain and warmer weather is causing the trees to be all confused -- they're in a strange transitional phase. Some leaves are still green, some brown and crackly, some completely barren, and then there are the ones that are budding. Yes -- budding. Oklahoma seasons are always interesting.






The best way to spend a rainy afternoon is sitting in bed, watching the droplets fall in rapid succession, eating cappuccino cookie dough ice cream (my own invention, thankyouverymuch) and knitting by the glow of the lights strung through my headboard. I probably could have stayed there the rest of the day.

I'm off to go eat a grapefruit sprinkled with sugar. Christmas break is already off to a glorious start.

I am constantly surrounded by sound. Music, people's voices, the cars outside, the pitter-patter of rain or the whistle of the wind. And sometimes, the constant stream of noise suddenly crosses that line, switching from enjoyable to unbearable and my head starts to pound. Sometimes, I just need silence.

When I turn everything off and let the quiet slowly descend, wrapping around me like a cloak, it feels as if though I am taking a deep breath. It's a pleasant kind of silence, swirling around me and settling on my shoulders. The quiet washes over me and fills my ears and I can feel myself start to relax.







Maybe it's the unusual weather, or the stress of the past week (finally on christmas break as of yesterday, hallelujah!), but I've been in a pensive, quiet, observant mood lately. Call me anti-social, but lately I've honestly preferred to sit alone with my writing than having to go out and talk to other human beings. I've been writing letters to people that I'll never send, sitting at my desk staring at the slate-grey sky, and unintentionally dressing in rather sober colors (need to get some more color in my winter wardrobe). Winter's kind of depressing sometimes, I have to confess. But for now, I'll try to throw myself into the Christmas spirit and sit in silence and write.

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ps I'm currently in the process of updating my faq page -- any questions you have that you'd like for me to include? feel free to leave them here or via email. thanks friends!